This decision might be one of the hardest one you will be forced to do at some point in your life if you belong to a cult. It is very traumatizing to build the courage to go against everything you’ve ever known and walk away from it, yet it can also be one of the most rewarding experiences as well.
Perhaps you’ve been having doubts about your current “religion” and did some soul finding or true researching and found out some useful information that made you realized that you are in the wrong place and need to start fresh a new life away from that cult… okay.. so how do you do that?
First you have to have conviction that what you are doing is absolutely the right thing to do and that is the only way to find your own happiness. From experience I tell you that getting my emotional and mental freedom was absolutely miraculous and wouldn’t change it for anything in this world. Been able to think for your self and make your own decisions is your Right as a human being, been deprived from that is a crime.
So once you are certain that that’s your path, you need to make a PLAN.. I call it.. The ESCAPE PLAN!
Before you say anything to anyone you must make in your mind a complete plan of what you are going to do when you leave. Most cults use shunning for control so you need to plan who you will contact, where will you stay, are you staying in the same area or will you be leaving… will you keep your job? This are all questions that you need to answer and have a back up plan to. Basically try to imagine that something wiped out your family member who belong to that cult and any so called “friends” from among them and then ask yourself.. if they don’t exist anymore.. who could I go to for support and for help?
It will be a blessing if you have family members around you that are not members of the cult… it will make your life so much easier.
After you save some money and have reached out to those who you plan to go to for help… then it’s time to talk to your family first. Make them aware of how you feel now and stand firm in your ground. They will have to pass all the grieving phases of a family who has died.. Basically they will mourn you while you’re still alive.. but ultimately they will shun you. Don’t blame them.. they, just like you were, are brainwashed.
Once that is over, it is time to talk to your church members.. and make it formal so have a written letter where you state you are leaving for good the church and want nothing to do with it. There may be some consequences they will try to put upon you to make you feel guilty and not want to leave..but don’t be discourage.. they do not own you.. you are a free human being and you are not breaking any laws.. you have the courage and strength to do this. Trust and believe me when I say this.. You will be better off without them. It just takes time… time you need to cleanse yourself from that corruptive and controlling thinking.
All the best wishes. 🙂
PS: and don’t forget, once you are out, it is crucial to build a support system. Those are the ones who will sustain you in your worst days.